DOGROY interviews comedian Tyson Bradley

Shplain who y'are.

I am a Canadian comedian from Canada who does comedy. I make videos that are funny which can be found at @TysonComedy on various digital platforms on internets. I make people laugh (or cry) by doing stand-up comedy in the United Kingdom

What brings ya to these here parts?

I was paddling in my canoe when I got lost and ended up on the shores of the UK. Surprisingly, I was welcomed in with open arms and haven't been deported yet.

What's yer greatest crime?

I once was driving my sled dogs when the lead dog saw a squirrel and decided to run a red light. The Mounties were not happy about that.

What's yer weapon of choice?

An ice hockey stick

What's the most powerfulest thing ya've ever done?

I once witnessed a head on collision between a bear and a moose. I had to put the moose on my shoulders and carry him to safety before he caught fire

What is your favourite poo?

I would have to say goat poo is the one that is easiest to get off of your shoes

What's yer fayvorit bayst te ryde or get ryd by?

Höfner 500/1 Violin

If ya were the High King o' the Land, what would ya be at?

I would make it illegal not to have a Tim Horton's in every village. We would report the NHL ice hockey scores/highlights on all major news media outlets. Justin Trudeau would not be permitted to do black-face & Justin Bieber would be banned.

What's the most spine tingling thing ya've ever seen?

A beaver with no teeth

Attack: Right hand slap

Defence: Offence is the best defence

Power: Produce unlimited amounts of maple syrup

Fear: NO FEAR

Smell: Rustic wood

Wealth:

Assets tied up in the family snow making business

What d'ya think o' me mother?

She ghosted me

Length of willy or husband's willy:

4 Timbits

How d'ya expect te die?

Attacked by an angry mob of vegans who got upset when I poked fun at a polar bear outside my igloo

Favourite shape (No 3D ones please):

2D Maple Leaf

Dogroy’s questions had to be transcribed for him by his mother because he is retarded.